The unicolored rainbow

Back from a Sabbatical

2011-02-08T18:37:00.002+08:00

I got lazy to blog. Or perhaps I just ran out of things to say. Or maybe my life was too boring that I had nothing to blog about. Anyway the deteriorating of my command for the English language demands the survival of my blog. I am simply disgusted with my inability to come up with any decent sentences anymore, and I thought my English was not very good last time. In retrospect, it was quite satisfactory. Will I perhaps find in retrospect in the future, that my English used in this post is quite satisfactory too?

Reading through my previous blog posts, I felt that I was quite poetic, a few years ago. I forgot too, how much I love word play. These days, I never have the flow of English language I used to have. I wonder where it has disappeared too. Did it disappear together with my past when I abandoned my life in Malaysia and decided to start anew in Singapore? If so, I shall sincerely apologise for discarding what I used to have. Can you please please please come back, my love for the language?

Another reason could be because I was experiencing an emotional roller coster then. People often say that poets are very emotional, and they write best when they're upset, or drunk. That is true to me too. I used to write best when I was upset. Of course, I did not deliberately upset myself just to write better. Now, life is peaceful. So maybe the spark lighted for the one last time before the roller coaster retired, never to rekindle.

The other reason I can think of is my perfectionism. It has been bugging me a lot lately. I noticed ever since I came to Singapore, or at least, ever since I scored ok for my exams, I have been waiting for the perfect idea to come every time I write an essay. I will wait for the perfect idea, I will wait for the perfect sentence, I will wait for the perfect word to jump into my mind, which of course never happens. So ends up, I waste half the time waiting, and only have half the time remaining to cram whatever second rated stuff I have rushing to be put onto paper in my brain. I know it is not a good thing to do. Yet I have no idea how to rectify this problem. Until the problem is resolved, I think no improvement for my writing will occur.

Finally, it almost slipped out of my mind how hardworking I was in the past. I used to role play nearly every single day, and try my best to write a poem every single month. Of course, I did write a journal - albeit the traditional paper version, until I decided to blog it - frequently too. All these stopped last year, which coincided with the year I came to Singapore. I am convinced it is not a coincidence now, though I haven't figured out what in Singapore has deterred me from practicing writing regularly, which contributed to my English going downhill.

Of all the reasons above, I think the main ones are my perfectionism and lack of practice. I shall start blogging more often, so that it can help curb my problem of perfectionism, and give me some practice in writing, on top of those given by my teacher at school.

Momentum

2010-07-14T21:55:00.001+08:00

I'm still doing very well in Singapore.. I hope I can keep up the momentum and continue to strive for excellence in my end of year exams.

Blow Wind Blow

2010-07-02T20:45:00.003+08:00

It's now the end of term 3 week 1 and I summarise this week as being horrendous in general. There were still some bright and shiny gems this week but unfortunately they all turned dull too early, or rather they couldn't fight against the overwhelmimg dullness that clouded over them and were outnumbered.

The bright and shiny gems of the week were my results. Before the month long June holidays, we had our mid year exams. The last day of our exams was the last day of school, so of course we had to wait till after the school holidays to know our results, which is this week, term 3 week 1. To be honest, I had no expectations for my results because it is the first major exam I'm having at this school. I like to give myself space, to see how well or badly I did, so that I will know what to do the next time. So this mid year exam was rather like an experiment to me, but not without some pressure as I scored quite well in the common test. Anyway I am very pleased with my performance for the mid year exam. I topped six out of eight subjects in my class. But then again, my class is not the best class, so I did not top the subjects in the entire cohort. Still, that was enough to keep me happy for one and a half day.

What happened next came so fast that I couldn't believe it could all have happened right after I received super good news. Firstly, the weather this week has been quite unpleasant. It rained on Tuesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday, which means more than half the week It is in fact raining right now as I am typing this post. But rain cools the weather, so I guess it balances out the plus and minus, which of course is the inconvenience of walking in the rain and getting wet.

Secondly, the issue of changing seats. I can't say it was totally a surprise, as my teacher did say she had to split us (me and my table partner) up if our results turned out to be bad. As it happens, my results were splendid, I was top in class so I thought ok we're safe now. But no! She said the disparity of our results are too huge. We cannot sit together. We have different study methods. Uh what was that about? How does she know we have different study methods when she has never seen us study? It was obviously just an excuse. Fine with that, she wanted to change our place. What's bugging me is why can't she just say that we are very noisy and disrupting the class? She said 5 subject teachers including her, think that we should split up. Right that's nearly all of my teachers. I highly think that is not true.

Originally, my teacher moved my table partner away, but she couldn't find a suitable place for her without many many objections, from both my partner and the person she was supposed to change with. So I was changed away instead, and another friend in our group of four, to a place which is at the last row, which means I have one less person to talk to. And there's no one on my left side, which is another less person to talk to. And I just don't quite fancy my new table partner and the people around me. Sigh I guess I'll just have to put up with them as it is unlikely that I get to change back to my original place, which brings me to my next point.

On the day after we got back our English paper, I saw that I had written the wrong format for my situational writing, which never never occurs. It is the first that I've got the wrong format, which is the one that my teacher taught. So I started discussing all my teacher's flaws with my friends, who all agree with me. Unfortunately she heard us. She didn't tell me that she heard me, she told my friend she heard her, which obviously means she heard me too. Well whatever. I can hardly care that she heard us. At least now she knows how much we hate her. But I would rather have told her directly, or she tell me directly that she heard me. She doesn't seem to be showing any signs that she heard me, she still addresses me, not that she does that a lot. I can't seem to help but speculate that, maybe the whole issue of changing place is just because she heard me. That's why she changed our seats, as revenge or whatever.

Anyway she's not the only teacher I don't like. In fact, I think I don't like all of my current teachers except humanities teacher and I'm indifferent about my physics teacher. We just changed all of our science subject teachers. The irony is we are a triple science class. What are we now with not so good teachers for all sciences? It's also been said that we are the worst class in terms of academics amongst all four triple science classes. Then why are they changing our teachers? It's not that they're giving us better teachers. How do they expect us to perform when we have lousy teachers? They should stop giving the best class the best teachers. They are already the best class. A not so good teacher will not harm them because they can manage on their own. This is usually what happens in Malaysia but in Singapore, no. The best class gets the best teachers, the worst class gets the worst teachers. Yeah well like they have given up hope on us. So there's nothing we can do but buck up on our own.

All my teachers are now teaching from the textbook. All my previous teachers never used the textbook. It's like opposite ends of the pole. We are all resenting this style of them right now. It will take some getting used to. However by the time we've got used to it, our previous teachers would have returned to us, except the physics teacher, who has left for good, and we will have to revert back to our old style again. I appeal to the school, can you please stop playing blow wind blow with us? We're not having fun, I don't know if the teachers are having fun. And it's not like the teachers are super nice as a person too. They're not very, I guess. One has no sense of humour, one is overly sasrcastic, the other is.. I don't know. In addition to that, we now have a co form teacher who does not teach us any subjects. Why the need for his presence then? And we have dialogue sessions with our form teacher and co form teacher. I can't imagine having a dialogue with someone who does not teach us at all. Well good thing I already had a dialogue session early in the year, so I hope I won't have to be down for another dialogue session. Another thing, the only classes with co form teachers are my class, N and S. N and S are the last class of double science. My class is the last class (unofficially) of triple science. It's like equating us to the last class of the whole cohort, who usually have lots of problems and are hard to manage. How humiliating and unfair it is.

I guess if I want to continue my performance for the end of year exam, I have to build up momentum on my own. Sad case. I didn't come to Singapore to get an education like this, or to have different teachers push us around.

Picture This

2010-04-19T17:42:00.001+08:00

My [weird] physiotherapist told me that she can just imagine me in long hiking trousers, digging, in a desert. Huh. She asked me to post it on my blog that a crazy therapist told me xxx.. and here it is LOL.

OAC Day 3

2010-03-21T20:20:00.000+08:00

Worst day of all three days, but still fun I would guess. Worst of the best. How bad can it be? There were no activities arranged for us today. Instead we spent the entire time, or almost 75% of the time cleaning up. Since we had finished all our outdoor cooking sessions, we were able to finish breakfast early. Not a good thing at all.

When we woke up and met with our instructors, we were told that we would be cleaning the dining hall. What a relief, at least it's not the toilet. So we ate breakfast heartily. Who knew, after we had breakfast, one of the leaders came and told us to clean the toilets. Oh well we didn't make a fuss about it as we were all sporty people. We cleaned and cleaned, quite having fun as well splashing water and screaming at the sight of cockroaches. After some time, the toilets were cleaned to the satisfaction of the leaders. We thought we were done for the day but again, who knew, we were then asked to clean the dining hall.

This was met with confusion, because we thought that there was a miscommunication among the instructors and leaders and we were indeed assigned to clean the toilets. So what were we doing cleaning the dining hall then? Nevertheless we still wiped the tables and chairs, lift the chairs onto the table, arrange the tables, swept the floor blah blah. Until the other class who had outdoor cooking finished their breakfast. Their instructor asked them to start cleaning the dining hall. I stared at her with disbelief. What? We just cleaned it! Was she trying to insult our bad cleaning or what?

So that other class began sweeping the floor, when we clearly had just finished sweeping it. We were unhappy about it. Now they asked both classes to arrange the tables together. We stood to our grounds and did not want to budge. The other class, seeing us stationary, decided not to do anything either. My friend even overheard someone saying since they (referring to us) had been cleaning, why not just let them continue cleaning? After seeing this 'commotion', the instructor decided that they should just let us rest. Finally one sensible thing they did. In the end we found out that the other class was supposed to clean the toilets but because they were still eating, my class was instructed to do so. They escaped a much worse chore and are still here complaining? I was aghast.

After that we were lazing about, then packed up and left Labrador Camp Site. After a short debrief back at school, we were dismissed. I had post camp sickness after that. My legs were itching to climb things, and I developed some rashes. All in all, I really enjoyed the whole course of the camp.

OAC Day 2 (Part 3)

2010-03-20T13:31:00.000+08:00

Campfire.. what can I say. It was a total disappointment, despite everyone saying that it's the highlight of the event. Well not really, they said it was supposed to be the highlight of the event. But didn't turn out that way huh.

It was very dark, but it did live up to its name and there was a fire in the center of the ring. Even though there were campfire performances, and my class being one of the classes to perform, it was so dark that we couldn't really see anything much besides hear the people who were singing. As for campfire singing, we spent a whole two or three weeks to learn the song and I even embarrassed myself with my horrible voice but in the end, we only ended up singing like less than half of the songs. And as we were singing a capella and no one really remembered the lyrics, we were just humming all the way. It was quite messy. At least we sang the longer songs like Top of the World, If We Hold On Together, When You Remember etc and didn't sing some of my disliked songs like Cannibal King, and the OAC song that our school wrote themselves (this is an assumption based on the lyrics and melody). The teachers were so boring. They had been sitting by themselves, talking, sleeping, eating, enjoying, stoning, whatever among themselves throughout the whole camp and didn't even join us during campfire! We were doing a cheer and invited teachers to do along with us but they were just stoning there, sipping their drinks. Gah.

I guess the main reason we didn't enjoy campfire much was because we were expecting too much from it but only got so little of our expectations met. Also, we were all tired out from the day's activities. It was really a heavy day for us, or at least my class. I went back to my room feeling a little empty. It was the last night too, and I was feeling a little campsick already, but nonetheless, I managed to catch a good night's sleep.

OAC Day 2 (part two)

2010-03-19T18:50:00.004+08:00

After a tiring morning, well not really, most people I suppose had their energy eaten up by fear. Anyway I was hungry, with the breakfast which was insufficient. But lunch was a packet of instant noodle. Great. Even at home, one packet is not enough for me. So not surprising that I was again hungry after lunch. I started to wonder, was this an adventure camp or a famine camp? Probably a combination of both.

We had low elements and flying elements left. Not too bad, they didn't require much energy, or so I thought. Low elements were quite fun. We had activities that included sending balls across an 'acid pit', balancing a see-saw, walking some whatever thing and climbing a wall. This was one time when we got to spend some more time with our classmates, solving problems together and being mad together. You know how much I enjoy being active.

I was exhausted after low elements. Not because of the activities, but because of the amount I was talking. Bad thing really. Next was rock climbing. At first glance, the rock wall looked really really threatening. I didn't even dare to go try the first rock wall. That was the first and only time I did not have the courage to try out something throughout OAC. Anyway the leader said everyone had to climb at least once, so I went to the other rock wall to climb, which looked milder and non threatening. Did I ever discover how much fun rock climbing was! Yes it was tiring, hanging halfway there, while you feel like giving up. But giving up is not in my nature. So I went on and on and on to the top. Didn't feel anything much about it. I just felt like I could continue climbing endlessly. And even after OAC, I still had the urge to climb things for quite some time, before time washed it away. After I climbed the rock wall, I turned to be an anchorman, where my finger's skin got peeled off from pressing down onto the harness too hard. Ouch. My third visit to the first aid room. Am I injury prone? Well unlikely I think. It got me worried I couldn't continue the other activities, having an injured finger. I was afraid I couldn't grip on anything. What if my grip slacked while on the zip line? It was one of the activities I anticipated the most. But as it turned out, all activities I anticipated were a let down, whereas the other activities where I didn't get my feelings all hyped about it, left me with immense satisfaction after doing them.

Finally, our last activity before camp fire, was flying elements. These were a disappointment. Well not really. The zip line or flying fox, whatever it is called, was a huge disappointment. I thought it would be quite fun, but realized it was the most boring activity in the whole camp. You just jump down, end of story. Boring, no? I shouted some lines, which made it a little interesting but still, it was boring. Abseiling on the other hand, was fun fun fun. This is my second favourite activity, after rock climbing. Do you notice the similarity between these two activities? Yes you climb. One up, and the other down. I wonder what's with me and climbing? So what did I like about abseiling, besides the fact that I got to climb walls? During abseiling, I had the sensation that my life was tied onto someone else's and I could do nothing about it besides letting myself fall, fall and fall... and I kept banging into the wall. Oh I failed it miserably, but I still liked the activity on a whole.

End of the day's activity. Lucky we had no more outdoor cooking session and could eat as much as we wanted for dinner. Not that the food was very appetizing, so I still didn't eat quite so much, even though Mr Chue asked me to eat up. But I just couldn't, much as the hostel food was even worse than this.

OAC Day 2 (Part 1)

2010-03-13T12:40:00.004+08:00

Today was the highlight of the whole camp. We did high elements, low elements and flying elements. Today was campfire night too! I absolutely loved all the activities we had today, plus two sessions of outdoor cooking. I think I am one of the very few who really enjoyed all of these, even though they made me a little exhausted. But not exhausted enough that I hated everything we did.

We started the morning early, with a flag raising session. I was rolling my eyes when I saw the word flag raising inside the booklet we were given. It was unbelievable. I thought we would be able to get free of flag raising here at the camp, but apparently not. Not surprising though, since it says it's MOE Labrador Adventure Center. And the job of MoE is to instil loyalty towards the country amongst students. Flag raising is known as a common practice which can promote social cohesion. OK enough of SS. It's annoying to hear a national anthem go everyday, which is not your country's, to quote my friend.

Anyway after flag raising was our outdoor cooking for breakfast. We were to cook fried beehoon, which would last us till lunch time. We needed the energy for high elements, said the instructors. I didn't see why we would need it. My friend even felt nauseous when we were approaching the high elements, because she had quite a lot of food. If she didn't, maybe she wouldn't feel so sick at the stomach. The cooking session was as messy as ever, even though it was already our second cooking session. People were running everywhere, with of course, people doing nothing. And they were not willing to change their roles from yesterday's cooking session, which consisted of preprarers, cooks and fire starters. Eventually they did change, though I was still stuck at fire because no one knew how to operate that lighter. Never mind. At least today I didn't burn myself, and I got to eat quite some helping of the beehoon, despite it being quite salty and having a heavy pepper taste.

On to start the day. We were divided into 3 groups for the high elements. My group, having quite studious girls, with me being the most active one, of course started off the activity with me. Oh I volunteered to go first. I love doing things first. We climbed the broken bridge. People said that was the easiest of all, but I believed every activity has its own level of difficulty, or it wouldn't serve its purpose to be there. Checking my harness, helmet and every safety precaution, I started climbing up the steples onto the bridge. Being the first one, I was a little unclear of what to do, so I kept awaiting orders from down there. Wow, was it scary up there! Ok not so scary, but my legs began shaking on its own accord. Still didn't stop me from crossing the bridge. Halfway there, I heard the man saying he had set up the thing wrongly. I panicked, and instinctively stepped backwards. Then I heard him telling me to step forwards not backwards, so I assumed things were still alright for me. If it had not been, they could just pull me down from my harness. I continued across the bridge without any events, with my friends cheering me from down there. To go off topoic, this is what I love about girls school. No immature boys jeering at you. Until I reached the pole and got ready to climb down again. The man said I should climb up. The leader said I should climb down. They were disputing down there, with me halfway up the air. I didn't mind to be honest, if I was asked to climb up. But in the end, no, I did not climb up, so I climbed down, safe on the ground again.

When I got down, the man immediately climbed up. It confirmed that there was something wrong with it. Luckily I didn't fall and nothing happened to me. So then he went to fix it and blah blah. I wasn't there later because my friend had a splinter in her fingernails, as she had scratched the wood while coming down. Sounded like a cat to me! When I came back, they had switched stations and were now walking criss cross steel wires on the air. That was really scary, with only 2 persons in my group successfully crossing it all the way, and I was grateful I didn't have to do that, though I really wanted to do it, and almost got to do it. I told my leader I only did one and she asked me to do this, but time ran out. Too bad. I am not sure if I want to do it or not, but I think more of my heart is leaning towards yes.

Next station was called the challenging pole. I did not get to do this again because firstly, we were the last group to go do it so of course there would not be enough time, considering how slowly everyone was climbing up to the pole. Not that I would be very fast though. Secondly, I had to be backup belayer to the instructor because no one wanted to be. I was quite bitter about that because this challenging pole looked really fun. There were two, one where you got up the pole and the other the platform. I wanted to do the platform one and was going to do. The pole one looked fun too, but it was very scary because it was higher and you had nothing to hold on to. Did not get to do this, did not get to feel the exhiliration of flying down from the air, so nothing to comment. Can you hear the resentment from my writing? I bet.

OAC Day 1

2010-03-10T15:57:00.004+08:00

I just came back from OAC, my school's outdoor adventure camp. It was so much fun. This was the first time I've ever attended a camp like this. Sure, I've attended many camps before, but mostly we went around visiting places and not do extreme activities! I had never done any of the activities we did during OAC, which made it all the more so much fun.

We went to school as usual in the morning and had a session of ice breaker before departing to the camp site. It wasn't much of an ice breaker since we have been classmates for at least two months now and roughly knew each other already, if not a lot. And my classmates weren't all that in to playing the games, so the responses from them were sort of cold.

After a short briefing, we left for the camp site, which was MOE Labrador Adventure Camp. It was the least of what I had expected. In my mind, I had imagined it to be a place surrounded by forests, has a lot of mosquitoes and ants and what not, very run down, no beds, the usual cliche camp site. But it was way better than that. There were very little trees, almost no mosquitoes since I didn't get bitten at all, little ants, and beds for us to sleep in, though the mattress was hard. It was quite a good place really.

We proceeded with some small talks, settling into our dorms, a bit of campfire performance practice, then it was lunch time. Food was very much anticipated among us campers. We were all starving, and shall know that it would be the same for the next coming days. We were not allowed to bring our own food. They said they would feed us well -rolls eyes- as well as no handphone, no mp3, whatever, you know. Which got us bored. Anyway lunch was nasi lemak, with not much of lemak taste but still acceptable. Considered a luxury after going through all other meals.

Moving on to the next activity, we packed up our stuff, like umbrella, insect repellant, sunblock etc for our wilderness activity. We had to walk oh so far to reach the Labrador Nature Reserve. The walking part was more tiring than the actual activities itself, plus the sun was glaring hot. There were actually 10 stations for the whole activity but we only managed to do 2 full ones, 1 forfeited, and 1 half way done when time ran out. On our way walking, we suddenly all had this weird urge of singing nursery rhymes. I think I started it first xD. It was thrilling to be singing out at the sea breeze. My team mates complied by me too, so I didn't feel like I was singing alone. When we got the 2nd clue, we read and reread, and thought that we were at the right place. Our leader told us that no, we were not at the right place but my friend said it doesn't matter. We shall not listen to them and just continue walking our way. What cheek! It was funny though.

There was one station here that we were required to make a raft out of twigs. The raft had to have a sail and my bandana was used as a sail. It fell onto the cliff as they were throwing the raft down. The raft broke free of the string. We had no way to save the raft, but my bandana was quite important to be saved and the leaders spent more than half an hour saving it. Poor leaders. At 3:45pm, a slight drizzle started and we promptly went back to the camp site, dragging our tired body along.

A quick shower, where we only had like 3 minuts for each person and people yelling at you to hurry up each time, then it was outdoor cooking. I quite anticipated this, since again, I've never tried it before. We cooked pineapple rice. I was in charge of the fire. As I was the only one in my group who knew how to operate the lighter, and they didn't understand that the metal roller was scorching, and they kept asking me to quickly light up everything, I burnt my fingers then. Ouch. That made my first visit to the first aid room. Dinner was not much left when I went to eat. There was only rice and pineapple left, with very little chicken. I didn't get to eat the scrambled eggs which I heard was very tasty. Pity. Had a headache too, from the heat of the sun and the fire worsen it.

At night was campfire preparation, where there was a fire drill midway. I had a feeling that they did the fire drill on purpose so as to get us to assemble quickly. After that was sleep time. I slept quite soundly and only realized the leaders and instructors coming in to check on us once in the whole night. Which was a good thing, as I was quite tired on Monday.

Homesick

2010-02-16T21:06:00.000+08:00

I'm homesick.

New Year Resolution

2010-02-01T18:08:00.000+08:00

It’s been a long time - well not really – since writing a resolution. Being in a foreign country, my resolution would naturally have connection with the country I’m currently in. Firstly, I hope that I will be able to adapt to the new country and environment well, so that I can concentrate on my studies and continue excelling in it, besides having a fun time here as well. I do not hope to get top positions in class, but I hope I can be in the top 10% at least, since I’m in a very competitive country. I want to enjoy life and make use of all the time and opportunities presented to me, to make this studying in a foreign country a good one for me, though it is not the first foreign country I’m studying in.

Secondly, besides academics, of course I wish to excel in the other area of my talent, which is performing arts. Even though I don’t have much access to dance clubs in school, I will hopefully be able to find a dance school and continue dancing my heart out. I hope to have my injury fully recovered by this year, though it seems unlikely. It feels like I’ve torn my muscle permanently. I also hope to be able to play in a chinese orchestra. Playing music makes me feel so light hearted and good.

Other than that, I like sports too. I want to get all my jumps by the end of this year, without the teaching of a coach. It seems a very high ambition, but I believe I can do it. As for my other love ie tennis, I guess I’ll have to try harder to find a tennis partner to play with. I can’t be playing alone, I might as well be playing squash then. I want to master my serve in tennis. It still feels feeble.

Salchow

2010-01-30T20:19:00.002+08:00

I landed a few salchow jumps today. Some clean, some not so. I think I'm still lacking a 1/4 rotation in some of the jumps I executed, which means it will be judged as underrotation under the IJS. Anyway I'm not doing competitions so forget it. It has to be noted, that I self taught myself. The waltz jump, and now the salchow jumps. Skating lessons being so expensive here, there's no way I can take lessons. So the alternative is to teach myself. Watch youtube videos, and learn. There's a risk that you develop bad technic, but I am willing to risk it, if just to stay motivated on skating. I can't possibly be doing three turns, double three turns, double back three turns every week I go skating. What a waste of the $13. In fact, I didn't really do any three turns today, except the entry into the salchow. I can't for my life spin, so forget learning spins, though they do look cool. I've never really spun on ice before. As for footwork.. I think they're hard to learn on my own. Jumps will be the easiest. As long as you get the lift into air and rotation. Mao is practicing triple axels on her own, without really a coach's supervision, and she's having an underrotation problem, which she doesn't realize. At least I know I'm underrotating. Hopefully I can work on it and polish it some more on subsequent practices.

1 month

2010-01-26T20:14:00.000+08:00

So today marks my 1 month staying at hostel. Nothing much.. Just felt like saying. So far so good.

Happy Birthday

2010-01-16T22:50:00.002+08:00

... to me obviously. This has been the best birthday I ever remember.

On Wednesday, I went to Tony Roma's, as stated in my previous post. On Thursday, I had a Math Olympiad selection test, so I came back quite late and didn't do anything much. On Friday night, I had dinner with my third aunt. We went to a restaurant in Tiong Bahru called "小旋风". According to my aunt, the 小吃 ie 小笼包、烧卖、饺子 are quite delicious. But we strayed from that path and had rice with dishes. We ordered mapo tofu, kungfu chicken, golden ribs, fried calamari and seafood soup. Overall rating? 3/10 I would say. First, mapo tofu didn't taste like it at all. It tasted like chili tofu. The kungfu chicken was the best among the worst. So probably it didn't taste quite good either. The golden ribs were quite oily, and they weren't gold in color at all. More like a dull brown color. Looked so unappealing. The fried calamari was the worst among the worst. It was so oily, like it had been dipped in oil before. Uh yes I know deep fry requires dipping in oil but eww it was dripping with oil. Still I couldn't resist the taste of calamari. Seafood soup was good. I won't put it in the bad group. There was abalone, scallop, prawn and fish in the soup. I kinda liked the very seafood-y taste of the soup. Then we had dessert. Durian puff and red bean pancake. The durian puff was very good. First I like durian. Second, the filling is what you call in chinese 入口即化. Tasty. Red bean pancake was normal. After that, we went to buy some bread and then went back to hostel.

On Saturday, my cousin went back to Johor to remove the thread when she had her wisdom teeth taken out. So my third aunt was saying that she was planning to bring my fourth aunt (my cousin's mum) out for lunch or something. Naturally, I requested to be invited. I walked to City Square Mall in Farrer Park at about 12, for fear I wouldn't reach in time. Little did I know that they were not even here yet. In fact, they were only here at about 4:15pm. Talk about lunch. So after killing some time at Popular reading Nancy Drew, I went ahead and had lunch at the food court. I ordered fish ball noodle, only to realize that it's dry and not soup. Ah well I had no choice but to eat. Didn't quite like the noodle, but the soup was quite ok. After that I went to Braddell Heights cc to check out the chinese orchestra. I went searching up and down but couldn't find. And the staff was of no help. At about 3:30pm, my aunt called to say they were going to reach the mall soon, so I just left the cc, dejected that my efforts were futile.

We went to have late lunch / early dinner at a restaurant called 'BBQ Chicken'. I recommend it. It has a promotion now, $6.90 for a student meal, which consists of a main course, french fries, coleslaw and drinks. Very worth it, considering the original price of my meal was $11.90, and didn't include all the other side dishes and drinks. As for adult, they have the 1 for 1 promotion. This promotion will last till about February or March, and a new promotion would come out. Even though I wasn't all that hungry, the food was irresistible. Ended up licking clean my plate, plus some bites of chicken steak, spaghetti and fried chicken from my aunts and cousin. Later, we went to get some more bread for Sunday and Monday's breakfast. Then we walked around in search of cake. They went to get some Taiwan Egg Tart, but I wasn't fond of egg tarts. There was only one cake stall we saw, so we just hit on it. I had Oreo cheese cake, which wasn't all that bad, besides the fact that I was quite bloated. Finally, ice cream. I always thought Andersen Ice Cream looked delicious. But it didn't taste good. The taste was not thick enough. I prefer Haagen Dazs and Baskin Robbins I think. End of the day, end of excursion with my third aunt, at least for this month. Next will be during my cousin's birthday.

When I came back to the hostel, my hostelmates made a bash for me. They bought me a cake, a party hat and sang me birthday song. I was so touched. But too bad I was too full to eat the cake on the spot. It's still in the fridge.

I had planned to celebrate my birthday again on Monday with a friend, but another duty turned up and I had to forfeit the plan. So sad. I was hoping to buy myself cake. That would give me more satisfaction. It's glad to know that I can finally find happiness from myself, and not rely on what others give me. I suppose that's the resolution for my birthday. Once again, happy sweet sixteen to myself! And thank you everyone who has wished me a happy birthday. It was indeed a very happy one.

Sweet Sixteen

2010-01-13T16:57:00.004+08:00

It's not my birthday yet, but I decided to go for my birthday lunch today, as we have a half day off today, to celebrate the excellent O level results of the class of 2009. And it chanced that I had a voucher, which entitled me to 40% discount on a weekday and 30% on a weekend. Initially, I had planned to go on Saturday, the very day of my birthday itself, with Zhi Ying. But Zhi Ying is going back to Malaysia some time before our birthdays, so facing a free afternoon before me, why not go celebrate that day? I decided to just go ahead and go have my lunch today since it's such a good timing.

It's quite sad though, celebrating myself. So I decided to take photos, then at least I can share with my family. I told my mum that I was only going to order the ribs. That was a lie. I couldn't resist the temptation of soup. I had always loved soup and I miss it. The hostel doesn't serve soup. And soup of the day was mushroom soup. That is a soup I can never say no to. And I forgot the fact that the other time I had lunch at Tony Roma's with my parents, I went back home quite bloated. I had ordered the regular slab back then, with onion rings shared among us. I ordered regular slab again. Luckily the bowl of soup was quite a tiny portion, so I managed to take in my main course of St Louis Ribs with Carolina Honey, baked potaton and corn on a slab. That was so delicious.

I'll be having cake on Saturday. I want a candle. Just for the fun of it. But where would I get a candle? And matches to light the candle? Ah well we'll see. It's not Saturday yet.

Entree course

Main

Satisfied look

Loves life. <3>

Justified Accusation?

2010-01-06T16:19:00.002+08:00

It's the third day of school and generally it's alright. I got elected to be in the class committee as sports rep. I thought that was one good way to get belonged in the class. It's been quite useful. Classes are not very interesting as of now, since I already know most of the materials in chemistry, physics, additional mathematics and elementary mathematics. English might not be much of a problem, just got to get used to their style. Same as social studies. That is quite a new subject to me so I won't pass judgment on it yet.

What is upsetting me is my form teacher. Oh and on first impression, all teachers looked ok. But I think on second thoughts, I'm already eliminating most of the teachers from my like list or whatever of that sort. So what did my form teacher do? Yesterday she called me and pronounced my name in the Chinese way. She took it like it was a China Chinese's name. I corrected her. She called my name with the correct pronunciation later. That was yesterday.

Fast forward to today. This morning in the bus, my friend told me that my form teacher talked to her and asked how to pronounce my name. I thought it was nothing. So I went to school. Fast forward to her period. I went to get a form from her. And that was when she told me she asked the head of chinese department teacher on how to pronounce my name and she agreed with my teacher, the way of pronouncing it. I again told her that no, my name is not pronounced in the Chinese way. And she said I'll call her and ask her in front of you.

Right I'm generally sensitive, and I know that. But seriously? What she just did was like an insult. A disgrace. Total disrespect. She's accusing me of pronouncing my own name wrongly. Who is she to tell which is the right pronunciation or not? It's not in the dictionary. It isn't standardized in the whole world how to pronounce it. That's why I forgive people when they pronounce it wrongly. My dad gave me the name. It's supposed to be unique to me. Only my dad can say which is the right pronunciation. But my biggest problem is I deem it quite disrespectful that she could not accept the way I told her how to pronounce my name, and had to ask others how to pronounce my name. That's why I'm so upset.

Happy New Year

2010-01-01T00:00:00.001+08:00

Happy new year! New year, new goals, new challenges, oooh how I love them all!

Same difference

2009-12-31T23:09:00.002+08:00

Singapore is not much different than Malaysia, in terms of environment and climate. The geographical stuff are very much the same. That's why I don't feel really foreign here. I've not really been homesick ever since I moved in to my hostel. Probably because I'm so busy nearly every day.

I like life in Singapore, as of now. I'm not sure if the same can be said when school starts. 3 more days for me to enjoy. Life here is kinda like Japan, especially Tokyo, the city which I'm used to. High rise buildings everywhere, people walking around, undergrounds available. Also, the public transport is very efficient, though sometimes I may need to walk to get from the station to my destination. It's very safe here, so I can walk around alone. As long as I don't walk alone at night. That's probably the main reason why I like life so much here. I'm pretty much a loner at times, so I love it like this. Also, people usually don't do what I normally do.

One thing though, people keep saying Singapore is efficient, including me when I was asked about my impression on Singapore. That was because I didn't want to use the same words as everyone else. So yeah, I didn't really mean that. First reason why I say Singapore is inefficient. Star Hub. I went to Star Hub several times (the outlet in Causeway Point, Woodlands). The staff asked me to take a queue number, so I took one. But the numbers never moved. We waited about an hour but was not served, so in the end we decided to go SingTel. Too bad Star Hub. It's your own fault.

Second, Raffles Hospital. I had a medical checkup, arranged by the ministry of education, to check that we are medically fit to do our studies in Singapore. I was there from 9am-3pm. 6 hours. Had to wait for about 30 minutes to get the queue mumber. We were quite in front if not for people cutting queue. I had to wait hours till 11:30 to get my health and weight checked out. Just checking height and weight took that long to wait. Seriously. Next, I got my blood pressure checked at 12:30pm. Then 2 hours later, at 2:30pm, only did I have my blood sample taken. 30 minutes later was x ray. That was the fastest. Sigh I think they are really inefficient in doing work. Or moe's fault for bringing us all together in one batch. The hopspital was quite crowded too.

So what this all these delaying result to that I am so angry about it? I had to take a cab to school. I was supposed to be at school between 12noon -4pm. But I wasn't in time. So I took a cab, and what did I do at school? Talked to the teacher for like a few minutes, bought some stationaries. That's all. And I spent $10.40 for the cab. My other friend (from another school CHIJ Toa Payoh) whose teacher asked her to take a cab, helped her to pay for it. Mine? Crap seriously. I kinda have made up my mind to hate her.. lol.

I miss writing. I haven't been writing for a long time. And I miss stretching. I hope I don't lose my split. I miss skating too. But I don't feel like going. It's very expensive. I miss ballet. I miss tennis. I miss my erhu. I miss basically almost everything from home.

The Last Supper

2009-12-21T22:38:00.002+08:00

I'm leaving my home tomorrow. Technically, I'm not going to Singapore tomorrow, I'll only be going to Singapore on the 23rd. Tomorrow, I'll be staying a night at my grandparents', then leave for Singapore the next morning. Still, I think the statement I'm leaving home will suffice to describe what I've been feeling for this past week mainly.

Many people are treating me like I'm leaving forever. It's annoying. Sure, I'm not sure if I'll have the chance to come back, since things do happen, but I think my parents will make sure I come back. And all my friends too. Oh and I don't think I'll come back because I can't adapt there. In my mind, that is the loser attitude. So I think in the beginning, I'll go whining and all that, but I'll stick it till the end, just like how I stuck out to the end here. I made the choice after all. So no matter how bad it is, I'll make it good. I think I can handle that now, thanks to some people's help.

There are certain people who have made impacts in my life for these past years. Unfortunately, academical teachers can hardly ever make it on to the list. Even if they're on the list, it's not because of their teaching of a certain subject. It's some other role which they play in my life. So if you think you're not an academic teacher to me, there's a high chance you're on the list. And of course, some friends are on the list too. I'm not divulging the list, though some day I might acknowledge all of your doings (well I already did that to some).

Mum is cooking all my favorite food. Good. Food in Singapore is terrible. But really, it makes it feel like it's my last dinner, which brings me to the thought of 'The Last Supper' by Leonardo da Vinci. That is so emotional. Left my tennis coach without a proper goodbye, left my skating coach last Friday, left my ballet teachers last last week, left my erhu teacher today. Most of them are asking me to go see them or text them if I want to have lessons when I come back for holidays. Thank you so much, for all you've taught me.

On a different note, I had just been lazing about this holiday. I really can't be bothered to do anything much. I only just finished packing. Well not really finished, but I'm mostly done, after much procrastination.

I don't celebrate Christmas, so nothing to anticipate. Gifts from few people, thanks Molly (even though I don't know yet what you gifted me) and Audrey (good luck in Australia). Though pre hexmas has been quite fun. Pity my time is not controlled mostly by me now. Not much liberty left. Ah well I'll get used to it I suppose. Or I hope so.

Holidays

2009-11-13T15:04:00.001+08:00

School's officially over. I shall miss you forever. The final moment was a bit emotional for me, seeing as I only told my form teacher that I am leaving like 5 minutes before school ended. I didn't do it though, I don't know who did, there were just too many people around there. Someone said I was transferring, and the whole truth just came tumbling out.

I miss school

2009-11-10T20:42:00.002+08:00

I can't believe I'm saying this, but yes, I miss school. I don't think I would ever have said this had I still been in Chong Hwa. The most I would have said was I miss my friends, and probably some of the teachers. Undeniably I had a pretty good relationship with many of the teachers there. Here, in TS, I didn't really establish a close relationship with any teachers. I'm only quite close to one teacher. But then I actually enjoy life here more than CH. Granted, I'm not very well known here. But I prefer it that way. I think I prefer a smaller school to a bigger school. In TS, there are only about.. 1500 people in form 3-form6? I'm not sure, but certainly not so many. This probably means I will like a liberal arts college's community.

I miss school. But I'm happy I have had a moment in life where I love school so much. It might have stemmed from the fact that people of TS love their school too.

Hiatus

2009-11-03T18:37:00.002+08:00

After a huge hiatus from math, I'm finally back to my math quest. I think the mathematical olympiad will be an accurate representation to what I refer to as math in this context.

However, picking my pace back up is not as easy as it sounds. Granted, I've been doing O level mathematics, but still those are arithmetic, simple calculation problems. I didn't need to use my brains much. I'm afraid my brains have gone a little rusted.

This is my first competition this year, signing up as an individual. Sigh, after I transferred, I never had a chance to go for any competitions. They only allow form 4 and above to participate. Ah well I'll never go now, for I'm leaving.

But I still love math, just as much. And the international mathematics tournament of towns? It's the best mathematical competition ever, so I've heard. The problems and solutions are just beautiful. And I have an appreciation for beauty.

Genting Highlands

2009-10-24T08:51:00.003+08:00

My school trip was to Genting Highland. A return there after 9 years. My last visit was when I was 6. Granted, I have been to Arena of Stars a few times between those years, my most recent one being January this year. However, a visit to the theme park has been scarce. As far as my memory served, the one time before was when I was 6 and now it's the second time. I was pretty excited, as anyone could tell.

However, it was totally crushed out. The theme park itself was boring. Yes I did not take roller coaster ride, besides that Flying Dragon which was claimed to be lame. But then it was still boring. Not to forget that I have been to Tokyo Disneyland twice, so I can't help but make comparison between the two. And Genting Highland falls way behind the scale. For one, the service is horrible. They're really slow. Even though Disneyland has so many more people, I could still get on more rides than here in one day. Also, Genting Highland doesn't have a well planned route. Each ride is so far away from each other, that I get pretty tired just by walking around. Disneyland is much larger, but it is in a very systematic way. Go Kart? I drove like 5 rounds probably? That I grew tired of it. If it was only a round or two, probably I would like it much more, and the queue wouldn't have to be so long. Ferris Wheel? It turns too many round. I think the only one I enjoyed was Bumper Car. Besides, I find it annoying that so many rides are under maintenance. They have only a few rides, minus those under maintenance, how many are actually rideable? I paid to get here you know. Indoor theme park was much the same. I think I only had 10 rides? Or slightly more than that, indoor plus outdoor. Pathetic number. Ripley's was alright, some of the exhibits were interesting, but I got tired reading one by one. Snow World was fun, throwing snow at each other.

As much as I'm upset about the physical park, the time spent with friends was priceless. This is the first and the last trip I'm going with friends from SMK Taman SEA. Love you all. xoxo

Love or unloved?

2009-10-22T19:52:00.002+08:00

I don't know what's with this getting along with people well thing. No I'm not complaining. Just wondering. Wait.. is this even a matter worth pondering?

Over

2009-10-13T21:52:00.003+08:00

So PMR is over. I think I screwed up BM and Chinese. Ah well I won't be here to know the results, nor would any of my family members be, so no one is going to take it for me till.. later. Even though it's not going to make much impact in my life, perfectionism kicks.

Life is back to normal. I get to waste time again. Or rather, life is just going to begin. I'm excited to go to Singapore, but I'll miss my 'family'. Time for reminiscence and I better value all the time I have now.

Anyway, I should start with my off ice practice again. Been slacking for quite some time. No more using exams as an excuse.

Tensed

2009-10-03T09:27:00.003+08:00

Tensed about exams, it's making me cranky. Though the only thing bugging me is BM. I've compiled a list of useful sentences and words on the computer, and my inconsiderate (felt like using a swear word, but yeah well) brother keeps hoarding the computer. Sigh I get stressed when I can't get something done immediately. And I've been doing it for 2 days now. What if it takes another 2 days? I don't have time to memorise it then. I like giving myself ample time for everything.

Yes? No?

2009-09-24T11:12:00.003+08:00

Got offered scholarship from Singapore. Should I go? Or not? Well my parents are dead set on me going anyway, so yeah I'll be going.

I need to write, but I don't have time. D:

Smooth Sailing

2009-09-22T23:40:00.002+08:00

I taught myself the waltz jump and a two foot spin yesterday. xD Cleared up my forward left, right crossovers, taught myself the advanced backwards crossovers, going to teach myself bunny hop if coach doesn't get to it soon. Great, I'm nearly finishing up all the elements for FS1, just need my coach to polish up for me. Not that I've finished Alpha-Delta though. A few more elements left.

I really like jumping. It gives me the exhilarating feeling I've been missing so much because of all the stress. Basically, I like the ice.

Finals over

2009-09-17T17:36:00.003+08:00

Finals are over, and I aced them all. PMR in 20 more days, but meh it's not really a big deal. You get 100, it's A. You get 80, it's A too. So whatever, I won't take it as hard as I took my finals. I needed good marks in my report card. Perfectionism kicks in.

Life's been boring lately. Not getting much improvements with skating, dance is kinda getting stressful now. Ironic really, seeing how I took up dance as a stress relieving activity. My splits are there, but my hip flexors are still incredibly tight. Stretching and stretching..

40/40

2009-09-04T13:04:00.002+08:00

I've maintained that score for mathematics paper 1 in the 6 months I've been in my current school. Not a difficult task really. Formative marks, ie my monthly test results, are both 100 for mathematics in the report card. Something I could never have achieved had I still been in Chong Hwa. Ah well. But for summative, I can't get full marks because of paper 2. During mid year exam, I didn't know how to do geometrical constructions. Now for trials, I think I messed up the pie chart, and something else. Still, I'm great, undeniable. xD

30 hour famine

2009-08-24T09:42:00.006+08:00

齐心赶走饿势力-You've got the power! That's the slogan for this year's 30 hour famine. I didn't join any DIY camps this year though, I became a volunteer instead. And boy, was it so much fun. The first day was the volunteer training day. We got to eat a small meal of mcdonalds before beginning our fast yay. Ice breaker was fun and funny. After that was to educate us about World Vision and the theme of this year's famine camp - food crisis. Some videos by World Vision Australia were shown. Those poor kids. Well that's why I was there at the camp anyway. Finally, we got to the part where we were supposed to get ready for the big event on 23 August! I was arranged to the Collection Center team, where we were to give out the break fast soya bean milk, some garbage bags, child sponsorship form and a feedback form. Easy job. Were done within one hour? Something like that. Plus briefing, and some touring around the stadium, we finished at 4pm. 2 hours earlier than the scheduled time. So I borrowed Jennifer's phone to call my mum. She was so nice, she had agreed to lend me her phone whenever I needed to contact my parents.

Day 1 over. Day 2. We were supposed to reach at 7am, but since we had done everything the previous day, Sharon (our team leader) gave us special permission to reach at 8am. But I couldn't still. Had interview at 8:30am. No matters, she said I could reach at around 9. So reached at 9:15. Got my temperature scanned, cleared. Unlike school. Sprayed antiseptic, reported for duty, got the wristband. So there we were, at our station, waiting for people to come. It wasn't a very hectic work, since people came and gone. It was admittedly a little boring and uneventful. Anyway between work, I went in to the stadium quite a few times, to see which artist was performing. The crowd was huge, and the screams were deafening. Like a concert, not a famine countdown event. Ah well I've no complaints about that, it was sort of fun too. Fast forward. 3pm.

V-soy stock was depleting, but there were still cartons and cartons of Diamond water left, so Sharon asked us to give the water out. Tiring really. Climbing up and down the stairs, asking who wanted water. When we finished one carton, we had to go back to our room to get the other carton, walk all the way down, and up again. If we didn't have to fast, I don't really mind, but we were fasting, so it was a sort of energy consuming activity. We were hungry by the time we finished giving out the waters. There were several packets of food in the room, which were confiscated. People are not supposed to bring food to a famine camp.. duh. Even after break fast, the only food available was soya bean milk, and we could only drink their soya bean milk because V-soy sponsored this event. Anyway the food was so tempting! And the smell of cupcakes too.

We closed our center at 4pm and went down to the stadium to enjoy the remaining events. It was the conert. Gary, Athena, Yise, Hou Ren, Francissca Peter, Phoebe and Daniel came out to sing for the second time. They had already performed once previously. And at the final hours, they came to give us entertainment again. The peak of the whole event: appearance of World Vision Malaysia ambassador, A-mei. The cheers, and screams were again deafening. As a volunteer, I had the priviledge to stand in front, it was so awesome! She sang three songs and spoke a few words, and the final 10 seconds countdown came. Break fast! Congratulations everyone!

Unfortunately, as volunteers, we had to stay back to clean the stadium. Why can't Malaysians keep the place clean? We see everything on the floor.. papers, tissues, bottle caps, plastic bottles, and even masks! So unhygienic. And it wasn't that we didn't prepare garbage bags for you, we did! Sigh we had to clean up. And there was spilt soya bean milk everywhere.. well not really. Some places. And I left my gloves up there, but luckily, I forgot who, gave us another pair. Else we would be so contaminated with germs. But Evelyn picked up all the bottle caps soaked in soya bean milk with her own hands. I'm sure she had seen worse. Anyway, after cleaning up, we quickly sprayed antiseptic again. A lot of it too. Haha we're freaks.

Final session. Volunteer appreciation ceremony and photo shooting. Jolene, Nicholas, Roshan and fatty stayed back to take photo with us. So many photos! But I didn't bring my camera unfortunately, so I have to wait for some of my team members to upload the photos and send me them. And the whole event ended successfully. There was aftermath too. We went back to our stations. The whole team, well nearly the whole team of the collection center were waiting outside the room. For what? To collect some leftover stuff, which included soya bean milk, diamond water and can opener. The can opener was so beautiful. Sharon had promised us we could each have one, if there were left overs. And there were, since we didn't give any of the campers a can opener, except a guy who worked for World Vision. It was a successful haul. 6 bottles of V-soy, 5 bottles of Diamond water, a can opener and a certificate of appreciation. Thank you very much everyone!

Special dedication: Evelyn, Jennifer, Ching Wui, Sharon, Pei Ling, Joanne, Silvia, Ruby, Ice, Meng Ling, Loys, Lai, Sook, Aisha.. and anyone else I can't name, thank you very much for making this happen! Love you muchs!

"Family Photo" xD

38.4

2009-08-18T14:06:00.003+08:00

That was my temperature recorded, when my temperature was taken by a teacher at school. Cool right? I don't think I've ever had fever with that high temperature! And now I don't have fever, but the thermometer indicates that I have! I don't know if I should be indignant or what. Anyway my whole class was around 38, with a few exceptions of 37++. The thermometer was way cool, it uses sensor to detect the temperature. Luckily, else it would be so unhygienic.

Attached

2009-08-15T15:34:00.000+08:00

What happens when you have overexcitability and get too attached to someone?

Jumping up and falling down

2009-08-03T19:51:00.003+08:00

Stroking, forward crossover, I think I'm quite good at them already, both left and right. Finally didn't need my coach yelling leg higher, knee bend, arch back constantly. Three turns, they're still scratchy. Sometimes, I use my toepicks to turn, which is absolutely incorrect. I can't find the sweet spot, where it's not too far off back until I will topple off, yet not too far front that I'll be scratching with the toepick. And somehow, I can't really hold my edges. I'm not sure if it's to do with the blades, since no one really helped me get them aligned and I don't really know how to test it. I suppose I'll just have to make do with it.

My left leg is stronger on ice, my right leg feels light on ice. When I learn a new move, my left leg will get it first, but once my right leg gets it, the sensation is entirely different from what I feel with my left leg, and I can do it more relaxedly with my right leg. My left leg is solid, gripping the ice, my right leg is lightly brushing off the ice. I wonder which counts as my dominant leg then.

Anyway I learned two moves yesterday, one being a complete failure till my coach gave up teaching me that. The complete failure -> double three turn. I cannot do a double three turn. My single left forward outside 3 isn't quite correct, since I'm using the toepick, yet she wants to teach me a double three. Why not teach me backwards 3 first? But according to ISI, backwards 3 is not till FS4. So what am I doing with a double three? I absolutely cannot turn. I remember the first time I learned FO3 too. I was hopping and kicking around to get myself to turn. Same yesterday. Until I kicked my coach's leg with the toepick. I'm sorry coach. That was when she said no, forget it. You still can't get it. Fine by me. But the hopping thing got me thinking.. will I be wanting to do jumps so fast? Is it a sign that I might get quite well with jumps?

And I finally did backwards stroking. That's Beta level. Gamma, Delta, then back to Beta. Looks so odd, but who cares. Backwards stroking.. I managed it, except my back was tired from having to have it lifted. Next on will be backwards crossovers I suppose.

My coach asked me if I had my skates dyed. How hurtful!

Heartbroken

2009-07-29T19:41:00.003+08:00

My new skates are dirtied. They're not even a month old. Only about 2 weeks I suppose. I think I'm the only person who's ever dirtied their skates after 2 hours of handling. Well it wasn't entirely my fault. Silica gel is white, and so are my skates. Of course I couldn't see. I wiped it once, and under reaction with water, it turned blue. But now that it's evaporated.. or most of them has, my skates have become sort of whiteish. Unfortunately, my boot cover caused it to have smudges again. Ironically, boot covers are supposed to make my skates stay clean. Would I ever use it again? I don't know. I'm considering skate tapes. And I really need to polish my skates, provided that the shop does sell it. After 2 weeks.. yeah it's a joke. Sigh it's going to cost me some money. My parents do not understand my OCDing over my skates remaining sparklingly white. I mean come on, it cost a fortune! I was planning to use my skates for as long as possible, unknowing that it would become so dirty so quickly. And my coach asked why are your skates in this color. How insulting!

Stress+sick =?

2009-07-22T18:07:00.003+08:00

Sigh I'm feeling stressed up, though I don't suppose I have to be. I'm piling up my homework in one huge pile, and I worry day and night that I won't be able to complete it. I know this is an unnecessary action to raise my stress level, but honestly, I really can't bring myself to do homework. It's time consuming, redundant and well I just don't see a need to even have homework! I think I'm getting rebellious again, but I can't help it. I'm so bored. And I think I fell into that same old trap again. Life is going too slowly.

Even stress relieving activities.. dance.. skate.. watching movies.. they're not working for me. At the momeny I carry out the activity, yes, I do feel that the world belongs to me. But after that, I feel more stressed than ever, because I've used up my time doing those stuff, which leaves me with less time than ever. It's really odd, but I still can't find a point of equilibrium. Anyway, I only have August's monthly test, and it'll be over. September is trial. October is PMR. Gasp. Only like 80 more days to go.

And I am still not getting an A in BM. I'm frustrated. Maybe my teacher is marking too strictly. But if the examiner marks this strictly in PMR too, then I won't get an A. I'm pretty certain I can ace everything, except BM. And my teacher isn't doing anything to help us improve our karangan. Seriously, I'm devastated. I don't want to get a B for BM. Well I have a test tomorrow, I'll see if I can get an A then. I hope I do, it will assure me a little.

The weather is very bad these days. Haze is attacking once again. And once again, I'm being attacked by it. Sore throat, running nose, cough.. everything you can imagine. It's taking the life out of me. That's one of the reason I'm not up to doing homework. My brain is affected by it. It sucks out my mood, and leaves me as grey as the sky outside.

My movie analysis.. I can't do it. Perfectionism bites once more. I wonder why I keep going in and out of the phase.

Ruby Red by Linzi Glass

2009-07-15T18:21:00.006+08:00

It's a beautifully written book, entwined with politics and love.

Ruby Winters lives in a world divided by colors. The colors remain pure as gold, never contaminated, as though there's an invisible barrier between each colors, to ensure their purity. Like how water and oil never mix. But to Ruby's eyes, there is no separation of color. What sets them apart is their heart. To the outside world, she is white, and her companions are white. But once she crosses the threshold of her house, into the hidden world that exists behind the iron gates of her home, she is no longer who everyone sees on the outside.

Ruby is that invisible barrier, separating herself from her peers and everyone. A prefect and A student at school, working with Julian, a black artist, falling in love with an Afrikaan boy, she manages to not fall off the thin strand of line she is standing on, though she is constantly living in conspiracy. A remarkable girl, with remarkable courage.

I love the ending of the book. Unfortunately, I can't get a quote. I will try to though.

New Skates!

2009-07-13T19:12:00.005+08:00

Yay I finally got my new skates! Jackson Freestyle. And they do fit. Big relief to that, considering how much they cost. $189. Definitely don't want to take it all that lightly. Plus blade guards and boot covers and tights, about $215. Woe behold, my boot covers don't fit, though they said one size fits all. Anyway I kept stretching it, and the threads are coming off, but now it fits. Better than the whole thing not being able to fit, and I can always resew the threads. Another sorrow. My skates were dirtied when they were handed for sharpening. I can't figure out how to remove the stains, probably made by iron filings or some powder substance used for sharpening. The powders were invisible at first, but when I touched the boot, the powder smeared out, creating what looks like dark bluish stains. Scratch it. It's not iron filings. It's silica.. according to my dad. Though it shouldn't matter since I'll be having boot covers over them, but I really wanted them to be all perfect. They're new after all. I hate leather. I couldn't clean my leather ballet flats either, having them ended up to have blotches here and there. Sigh.

Anyway back to my skating lesson.. after being idle for three weeks. I did stroking, crossovers, and three turns again. Don't really mind though, since perfecting basics is really important. Left, right stroking, right over left crossovers, left, right, outside three turns one landing are all nicely executed. It's only my left over right crossovers that I can't do. For one thing, going clockwise is not a comfortable motion for me. Also I don't really have any confidence skating on right leg, especially not that lesson, as the blades were a little dull and I kept slipping.

I have no idea what the deal is with one landing, two landing three turns. I mean who cares how many landings you do? Sigh I don't know. And I never asked my coach what it was all about. Maybe I should, the next lesson. Much as I say I don't care that I'm not learning new things, I do. I have nothing new to practice, and that makes me bored. I also envy other students, who are not perfect at three turn nor crossovers or T stops but they get to learn bunny hop, two foot spin and all that. But I don't. And I don't want to waste 10 lessons doing the same thing over and over again. It's a serious waste of money. Time.. I have all the time on hand so I don't really care. But I think my coach is putting off teaching me new stuff until I have my own skates, so that I don't have to relearn some moves. Well now I have my own skates, we'll see how next lesson goes.

On another note, I have my left split when I'm fully warmed up! Considering I only began stretching for a month, and I had a hamstring injury. If I had not been injured, my right leg should have been more flexible. I don't know why, but I injured my right leg more seriously. Waiting for it to recover.. meanwhile, still stretching! I want to be able to do a spiral on ice! It's such a graceful movement on ice.. my favorite element! It's a wonder I still prefer Mao Asada to Sasha Cohen, who is so known for a perfect spiral. But the first thing of Mao which struck me was her spiral, or rather her cuffs floating about when she was performing her spiral. Which made me like her spiral.. maybe. I don't know, and I don't really have to know do I?

Lots of exclamation marks but I'm really hyped up about my skates! Hope to get to skate in them next week. I tried heat molding, but there wasn't any real obvious difference before and after. I daren't try heat molding a second time. My boots have been tortured enough by me, by all sorts of cleaning agents. I don't want them to spoil even before I start skating in them!

Passed out

2009-06-29T13:39:00.004+08:00

I passed out during assembly today. I did not collapse. I had a fleeting impression that I wasn't feeling well, and I was about to help myself walk towards the resting area when blackness clouded my eyes. So I crouched down, hoping it would pass soon. Unfortunately it didn't, and some member of PBSM came over. I could not see her just yet but I could hear and I forced myself up and walked myself.

It wasn't that hot and I had breakfast, so that was not the cause. It still has connection to breakfast though. The doughnut I ate during breakfast. It was already 4 days and perhaps it's sprouting fungus, though I see no traces of it, look, smell, whatever. So yeah I just ate. And maybe it really was the doughnut, since I felt uneasiness in my stomach before passing out. I have no idea how a stale doughnut can make me faint though. Maybe it's stale so my stomach rejected it, leaving my stomach empty as anything.. and I passed out of lack of energy? Mm interesting theory.

Aftermath.. I'm feeling kinda dizzy and having a headache now. Sigh maybe I should have never eaten the doughnut but it's already done so I won't look back at it.

The sensation of passing out wasn't really nice, but as it was a first, I took note to really feel every moment and with everything, I still express it best in my writings.

Friendship does last

2009-06-21T19:34:00.002+08:00

I went back to my old school yesterday and today. There was some exhibition thing but that wasn't the main reason I went back. I wanted to see my friends and teachers (not all of them though, only those whom I adore and who adore me too).

I initially only wanted to go on Saturday because everyone would be there then. However I had only 2 hours before I had to leave and it was too short a time to be spent together. So after hearing that most of them would be there again today, I decided to turn up today too. And I had so much fun with them, recollecting memories, reminiscing qualities of each of them, remembering the once upon a times.

They did not change much but according to them, I did. One of my teacher kept saying I've become prettier, many of them said I've lost weight. Not surprising to hear these statements from them.

It was just like the good old days. Maybe better, since I didn't really have to worry much. And I really value their presence, now that I'm separated from them. So cheers everyone!

The Cutting Edge

2009-06-12T20:11:00.003+08:00

I watched all 3 of The Cutting Edge movie. And I think it was a waste of my time, and their money for the production. The skatings were different, but the plot was nearly the same. It was all about someone getting injured, and that someone has to find another partner. And the partner were mostly hockey skaters, except for the second one, where Alex was a roller skater.

I personally like the second one best. It has a cute actor and a pretty actress. The main character was the daughter of the couples in the first movie so there was a slight continuation. The third movie wasn't a continuation of the previous ones. Sadly. Except Jackie Dorsey, who coached Alejandra and Zac. Pity Jackie broke up. I would have loved to see Alex and Jackie coaching the together. The second one is also not so much of a repeat of the first and third. The first and third were very very similar. Except that the girl didn't have any problem with partnering the guy in the third movie. There was a Pamchenko in the first and the third. They all fell in love with each other in the midst of skating in all three of the movies. All went to the Olympics. All got gold, I think, even though it wasn't shown them winning gold medal.

The three movies had a sense of deja vu about it. So I should give the first movie the most credit? After all it was the first one, it didn't have anything to copy.

Three Turns Again

2009-06-11T17:00:00.001+08:00

That was the first time I skated on a Sunday. And boy, was it crowded! Of course, it's a Sunday, plus it's school holidays. I'm glad that there weren't that many hockey skaters though. They are daunting! Good thing most of them were beginners who were at the railing, and not skating at the center.

I'm really bugged with some people who skate at the center when they're not doing any skills. Like just skating and skating. And worse still, when my coach draws me a circle, some of them even skate right onto it! Are they blind or what? When it's unavoidable, ok, I don't mind. But when there's so much space beside you, and you can't skate properly, avoid coming to the center.

I had my last lesson two weeks ago, so I had not learned anything new. I had nothing to do but practice my three turns, polish up my stroking and crossover, though those were harder as there wasn't much space. I taught myself left T-stop. That isn't much, since I already knew the right T-stop so I just had to apply the same technique to the left. And I tried to teach myself backwards crossover. I kinda got it I think. Backwards crossover and backwards stroking.

When I finished my last of 5 lessons, I requested for a Sunday time. They did not give me a time. I had to contact my coach directly. However, yesterday when I was at the rink, I saw that there were practically no classes during the afternoon. Do the coaches only work part time on Sundays? Perhaps so. But odd. There should be many people requesting class for Sundays. -shrugs-

ASEAN Scholarship Selection Test

2009-06-08T15:19:00.002+08:00

So I went for the selection test on Saturday. Don't ask me why I applied for ASEAN scholarship. I have no idea. Initially, it was because my friend applied for it. So I just followed her and applied for it.. for fun. Then with anything I do, I asked my parents about it. They asked me to go for it. I'm not really thinking of going to Singapore, since if I continue with my plan I'll likely finish secondary school by next year. Anyway that's not the point of this. I'm about to pour out my experience at the test.

There were 3 tests in total. General ability test, Maths and English. And it was from 8am to 6:45pm, with an hour for lunch and another half hour for break. Pretty much the whole day. I went there, thinking that the test hours were long. General ability test... 3 hours 45 minutes. It didn't sound right. And it wasn't right. Turned out that we had to go in groups to take the test, since they had limited booklets which could not be photocopied for copyright reasons I believe. So we only spent 20mins on the test, plus about 15-20mins for briefing and getting ready and stuff. So what did we do in the rest 3 hours? Half an hour was used for briefing in what the scolarship was all about. The remaining 2 and a half hours? Doing nothing. Waiting. What a waste of time. And I did not bring any books nor anything to do. This general ability test marks my 3rd IQ test taken in the past year. The first was WISC-IV, second was an abridged version of WISC-IV by UKM, third is this general ability test. Sort of like the MENSA test, the raven style.

We were dismissed for lunch quite punctually, at 11:45am and we came back at 12:40pm. They said the test would begin at 12:45pm. Well it didn't. It began at around 1:15pm I think. And ended at 3:15pm. We were supposed to go for a break at 3:15pm. But no, the collecting of test papers took like about an hour, and we were only free to go at 4:10pm. The break was then shortened to 10 minutes and we went back for our English paper at 4:20pm. An hour and a half for paper 1, half hour for paper 2. The papers were finished at 7:08pm. And with the collecting of test papers again, the whole selection test only ended at 7:30pm. That was 45mins later than the scheduled time. Way to go.

The main reason for all the dragging of time was the lack of staff members. There were like around 1000 people in the hall and there were only 9 staff members. Sigh.

Side note: Anyone aged 9-15 who wants to take the UKM IQ test can go here: http://permatapintar.com.my It's free of charge, and if you get through all 3 rounds, you'll be selected to go for a camp for gifted children. UKM should totally pay me for advertising. But well as an NAGCM member, I should advertise it. More about NAGCM here: http://nagcm.org

Forward outside three turn

2009-05-26T19:36:00.002+08:00

I skated from 2pm to 8pm yesterday. That is 6 hours. Minus two 30 minutes of ice resurfacing session, equals 5 hours. It's record time for me. I was tired and hungry, since I had my lunch at like 1:15pm, but I persevered, and it paid off. I'm really happy.

I had some problems with the boots, which makes me want to have my own skates even more. But I have to wait for my dad to go to the states to get them for me. The first rental skates I got, the left boot was missing of one hook. It didn't give me the ankle support I needed, so I changed another pair during ice resurface.

Disaster really happened then. My coach mistook my lesson time and asked me to be on ice at 3pm when I wasn't even ready. I reached the rink a little late that day, so I didn't have much of a warm up. Plus the boot issues, I really wasn't prepared. So anyway I stepped on the rink. Eek. Slipped. Tried to stand. Slipped again. Tried stroking. Couldn't really do it without slipping. So coach asked me what was wrong. I said very slippery. Asked me to stop giving excuses. I was like what!! It really was slippery and I had no idea what was wrong. After not being able to stroke, and saying it was so slippery again, coach said maybe the blade is blunt. Finally a constructive suggestion. She asked me to quickly change boots.

So I did it.. quickly. Sprinting to the skate collection counter barefooted, well I had my socks on. Tied the boots quickly too, and a little too tightly. Coach drew a big circle for me to do my crossover. But the boots were too tied, I couldn't skate properly. Decided to tell her now that my class was supposed to be at 3:30pm. So we continued after that, with me retying my boots and practicing a little before it resumed. Could skate a little better, but was still crappy.

So I practiced after lesson. Since I had a long time left before I had to go home, I decided to do it step by step. I kept reminding myself to control my edge for three turn. And about an hour later, I finally gotten my left forward outside three turn with landing. Phew. It took me a lot of practice to get it.

Then by 7pm, I could do both left and right forward outside three turn. And quite well too I think. It was easier to practice at night, since there were less public skaters. Most were figure skaters. And I met a new friend, Meera. :D

Don't know when's the next time I can go skate since my parents wanted me to cancel my Monday class and go with Sunday. So I had to book Sunday. No idea when I can get a time. Coach asked me why I didn't tell her earlier, she just gave her spot to someone else. Screw the counter lady. Last week I said I wanted to book Sunday, and she said no it's full. Jeez.

Anyway I'm really happy with my accomplishment in forward outside three turn. That's Gamma level, though I haven't really done Beta level yet. Wonder why coach is skipping that level, would it be easier?

Still hanging

2009-05-01T21:32:00.003+08:00

Actually, to tell the truth, my current school is crappy and it's so disorganized.

It's crappy that I get scolded for breaking the rules, when no one cares to brief me on what the rules are.
It's crappy that I don't know any 'traditions' of the school, because no one tells me anything about it.
It's crappy that I know nothing because I'm new.
It's crappy that I lose everything, to start a new life, but gain nothing.

If it's that crappy, why is it so hard for me to just drop it and revert back to the previous school?

Because I'm still holding hope. That the tides will turn.
Because I'm not willing to let go the time I have now.

Pros and Cons

2009-05-01T20:54:00.003+08:00

I'll go back to Chong Hwa, for the friends I have there, and to satisfy my parents. Else I hardly care to even be there.

I'll remain at SMK Taman Sea, for the time it gives me. Else I hardly care to even be there too.

And which outweighs which? I can hardly put my priorities straight.

The few things I like about the current school: Science practical lessons. Which are like once or twice a month? So far I've been here for a month, and we've done 2 lab lessons. And the most recent lesson was absolutely amazing, with green sparks shooting out of the heated zinc sulphide. 2 lab lessons in a month. How much does that weigh?

I like the library. It's small, yes, but they have a wide collection of English books, fiction and non-fiction. And the math and science books they have, they just mesmerize me. I feel so comfortable in there during break. 20 minutes break a day. How much does that weigh?

The time it gives me. Sure, I come back to school at 1pm everyday, and 12:25pm on Fridays. That is just way awesome. I get to skate, I get to study more advanced things on my own. Skating 3 hours a week. Studying 6 hours a day, which makes me finish everything so quickly. How much do those weigh again?

I dislike classes. They are seriously very boring. And math class is the worst. I can answer a question which is like so easy, and they all look at me like I'm genius or what, when I'm hardly even gifted in math.

I don't really fancy the girl I'm sitting with, but I have to put up with her because she's the person I got to be with for the whole year perhaps.

And I'm putting up with so much. I'm putting up with my hatred of school, just so that my parents get an easy time. But me? It's not so easy for me. Is that call sacrificial love?

Again, I'll go back only for the friends. Classes are still boring. But at least I have friends to share with that they're boring. And generally classes only last 40 minutes, unless it's a double period, which only exists for language subjects and art. But in my current school, it's mostly double period for nearly everything, which totals to 1 hour 10 minutes. Heck, I can't bear that long in class! It bores the tears out of me.

The biggest problem I'm facing is boredom. Still boredom.

Dilemma

2009-04-30T18:11:00.004+08:00

My parents or at least my mum seems to want me to go back to Chong Hwa. She keeps on hinting me. Like 'xxx said it's wasted talent that you transferred to a government school' or 'did anyone ask you to go back to chong hwa' or 'after June you can't go back anymore because then you can't take the UEC'

And the biggest problem I'm having is, I don't think I'll be able to take O level this year, for some reasons, which makes my transferring extremely useless. That was the sole reason I wanted to transfer to a government school, so that I can speed up everything, have more time to my own. Going to a crappy school but not being able to advance more quickly? That's not something I signed up for. I didn't throw away my previous life for this. I didn't go through everything for this.

I don't know what to do now. Part of me wants to go back, but I don't want to have my life all toppled up, my schedules rearranged and all that. And going back, is not a good idea. In fact, turning back is never a good idea, especially after I watched Gossip Girl. People change. They pick up whatever I've left them, and make their own new life, while I make mine. So the string is broken.

But if I really can't take O level exams this year, then what for am I wasting my time in a crappy school?

Anyway what's the deal with a normal life? How long more do I have to live this normal life? I'm like living the most normal life among all the other gifted friends I know. One went to Cambridge at 15, 2 did their O level at 15, several are homeschooled. Me? Went to a government primary school from 7-12. Like any other kid. Went to secondary school at 13. Currently 15 and in form 3. Just like everyone else.

Ice Skating

2009-04-26T00:14:00.003+08:00

I went for skating lesson on Monday actually. I know, it's been quite some time but I was just lazy to write about it.

So anyway, my new coach is Ms Cheryll. To be frank, she looks a little nerdy and odd. I believe she's quite young, but she looks quite old on the contrary, older than her age perhaps. I would prefer if she were more beautiful though, like Ms Jenny. Do not judge a book by its cover, but still, aesthetics mean quite a bunch to me.

I don't know if she's better than my previous coach, Bee Leng, but I like her class in the way that she's softer, and doesn't shout at me. I just hate people shouting at me.

Skating is a thrilling activity. As I step onto the ice, I feel exhilarated. When will the day come when the ice would belong to me? -keeps dreaming-

PS: I just had the thought that colors are overrated. So this post has no colored words.

Alone

2009-04-23T17:22:00.007+08:00

Math test was super easy yesterday. I seriously don't know how a test can be that easy. >.> I'm not bragging or whatever, but everyone knows my brilliantness in math right? xD

Anyway I just realized I've been doing pretty much everything alone ever since secondary school. I nearly always eat alone, study alone, spend break time alone, read alone, walk alone, go to class alone, go to school alone, play tennis alone (besides my coach), dance alone, swim alone, skate alone, attend camps/workshops alone, do volunteer work alone ... The list basically goes on and on.

Ironically, I'm a pretty much balanced introvert and extrovert. I don't know how I endured my life doing so much alone. I need a social life. Seriously. And it doesn't do to help that I'm sitting at the left most corner of the class. No one in front of me, only one person next to me and two directly behind me.

Speaking of which, I hate where I'm sitting. I'm exposed to sunlight like nearly an hour. It's not that I don't like sunlight, I don't mind it but the UV ray these days is going to spoil my cells. And I can't see the other end of the white board from where I'm sitting. And the chair makes my back hurt. It's awful. And I'm sitting inside, so I can't go in and out freely. Bummer.

My school uniform

2009-04-21T14:11:00.010+08:00

And there's my new school uniform. Not that the design has any different compared to Chong Hwa. Chong Hwa -> +0 for creativity >.>

Note the small, round, green thing at the collar? That's to differentiate between morning and afternoon session.

My name tag... And the school badge zoomed in.

Bits And Pieces

2009-04-18T20:53:00.002+08:00

I'm loaded with work now. There are projects to complete, and I have to study for mid year exam. Yes, I know, it's not till May but there are a lot of chapters to study, so it's better to start earlier than cram everything last minute.

As for projects, I was so used to getting all the information from teacher that now, I'm just lost. Luckily I still have some sources, but yeah, I still need to go fishing for information on my own.

It feels nice to know more than the others. Like during science class, we were learning the activeness of metals. And I was babbling off, K, Na, Ca, Mg, Al.. and the person sitting next to me was like staring at me, as though I was mad. xD They didn't even know what I was rattling about, as they haven't learned chemical symbol. How can you say you've learned chemistry without knowing chemical symbols? Except O2, CO2, H2O blah blah everyone knows that >.>

Second week

2009-04-07T17:39:00.005+08:00

To be honest, school is crap. Even though I keep telling people it's ok. The quality of the facilities and teachers and things taught is really horrible. But the people here are not too bad. At least they're better than the 3 Xiao boys, who were (note the past tense, since I don't know how they are now) gibberish and lame.

Had two tests today of which I did badly in both I believe... First 2 periods, science test, following 2 periods, BM test.

Moral periods are plain crap. The teacher asks us to act for nearly every period. Teachers are always absent too.

To my rivals in math competitions: I'm not participating in any math related competitions this year, since it's the school's policy, to not send any students until form 4, so that's one opponent less huh.

Unfortunately my talents haven't been discovered, but that means I can stay undercover longer. And if everything goes according to plan, this will be the last year of my secondary school life. xD

The first week

2009-03-28T17:38:00.013+08:00

The first week in my new school, SMK Taman Sea, had come and gone. In general, I thought it was pretty okay. Of course, it didn't go by without up and downs in my feelings; but I coped quite all right.

Some changes it had brought over my life:

1. I have more free time. Not more. I can say my free time increased by a 120%. I used to be very stressed out with life, but now, I'm more relaxed, and I managed to do an average of 2 chapters of O level work in 3 days. Going by this rate, I'll have sufficient time to finish the whole syllabus, before I take the exam.

2. I'm more back to my oldself, the person I was before I went Chong Hwa. I'm becoming more independent, since the teachers don't give much help, so I have to seek for solutions on my own. I like myself to be independent.

3. I'm retreating into my inner shell now. It's always like that. Whenever I go to a new environment, I'll be all mysterious, it'll take some time for me to loosen up, by when I hope I'm already gone.

4. Friends. I don't have friends as of yet, only acquaintances, whom I talk to from time to time. I don't miss 3 Xiao, but I miss 2 Zhong. The class and the people. Very much.

Dedications

2009-03-14T13:54:00.013+08:00

To Ms Chong - whose support for me has never faltered.

To everyone of 2 Zhong '08 - thanks for being understanding and walking the whole path with me.

To the boys - I enjoyed the arguments we have had. It enlightened my life.

To Elaine, Joy, Hsin Yee, Felicia, Yunzi - for being loyal friends and never abandoning me.

To Foong Yee - though I only got to know you this year, your company has been great.

To 沫利老师 - I love you. Thanks for loving me back too, and giving me so much, whether in substance or in support.

To 秀清老师 - I love you too. I appreciate the patience you've had with me, and the time you sacrificed in order to accompany me. Thank you very much.

And to everyone else, thank you for going through the end with me.

Never fading memories

2009-03-13T21:27:00.012+08:00

Today was the last day I'm schooling at Chong Hwa Independent High School.
The sky was gloomy, it had been raining all morning. And we were singing 'Can you feel the love tonight' which sounds a little sorrowful. Gosh, it just amplified the melancholy feeling in me.

Anyway, overall, it has been a great time for me.
Hope the memories we shared
don't fade as time passes.

Best Friends Forever (:

The Unicolored Rainbow

2009-03-13T19:27:00.009+08:00

The unicolored RAINBOW..
The name was chose because of the oxymoron
It was pure word-play
The meaning behind it
is pretty simple actually:
RAINBOW - a symbolic for life
There's no unicolored RAINBOW,
there's no unicolored life.
Life is full of COLORS,
and it's all up to you to live the COLORS out.